Real Romance or Really Silly?

Dear Neighbors:

This weekend, I saw "Sex & The City 2". While I won't blog about that until I'm sure that all of my friends have seen it, I found myself inspired by the trailers before the movie.

Lessons A Single Woman Can Learn From The Movies:

Contempt Breeds Familiarity
It's not backwards -- you're at the movies! Have a single male foe at the office? Do you friends have an irritating hanger-on who can see into your very heart within 5 minutes of meeting you? If so, he might be the one for you. At first you'll butt heads, but once you work together to achieve that common goal, deal with his Life Changing Event That Made Him Bitter and resolve that misunderstanding that is the staple of romantic comedies, you'll be well on your way to a lifetime of happiness. Need examples? Try "The Proposal", "27 Dresses" or "The Ugly Truth".

These movies tell women that we should seek out men who treat us badly and embarrass us in public because in doing so, they have a lesson to teach us. Usually, the lesson is that we need to loosen up and stop being so uptight. Everyone understand? Great, I just saved you the $10 for the latest in the Katherine Heigl Contempt series, "Life As We Know It".

What This Movie Doth Put Forth, Let No Plot Twist Put Asunder
True love can survive anything, don't you know? Regardless of the crazy stuff couples put themselves through, if they are meant to be together, they will always find their way back to each other.

On a side note, I don't personally believe that anyone is meant to be with anyone else. On this, we must agree to disagree. From my observations of human nature, I find that if both people are willing to make the effort, they'll usually end up pretty happy together.

My first example is the ridiculous "Serendipity". Note to self: if a man ever insists that you must track him down through a series of increasingly-stupid stunts and declarations, look for the bracelet on his wrist and return him to the appropriate psych ward. While it seems romantic that two people throw away their relationships because a chance meeting was "meant to be", it begs the question --how do you know when to stop?

Your $10 saver, the upcoming "Going The Distance", starting Drew Barrymore in a long-distance relationship. Oh, come on.

He Will Change. Yes, He Will Change
He broke your heart because he just couldn't change his wild ways. While you were ready for marriage and children, he was off saving the world, one artifact/treasure hunt/conspiracy/apocalypse at a time. Now you're together again because you're the only one who can help him.
But don't worry, he's going to change. Once he gets out of his predicament, he's going to stay home and be the best husband ever!

See any Matthew McConnaughey movie to see this formula in action.

The message in these movies is that if we wait long enough, he will settle down and realize that he'd rather be at home with a wife, kids and a mortgage than out saving the world. What the movie doesn't suggest is that maybe we need to look for the homebody in the first place.


Hot Is The New Ugly -- Or Is Ugly The New Hot?
Don't worry if you're not thin, attractive and well-dressed. You have so much going for you that eventually, a man is going to appreciate you. Well, not you as you are, but you as you'll be when the power of love takes over and transforms you. Just watch "She's All That", "My Big Fat Greek Wedding", "Sabrina" or "The Princess Diaries". Transformation first, love later. Nice message. You can't be yourself because yourself is not attractive.

The one movie that gets it is "The Truth About Cats and Dogs". Two women -- one gorgeous and dim, the other plain and sparkly. The man, of course, reacts as any man would -- he enjoys the conversation with Sparkly, but wants to get busy with DimBulb. Eventually, the required series of misunderstandings leads him to Sparkly. It could happen.

One never needs to suspend one's beliefs as much as when viewing a romantic comedy. Sheesh.

D