What If?

Dear Neighbors:

I see that I have readers extending around the globe. Welcome, everyone! And tell a friend. Seriously. Thanks!

I celebrated my 40th birthday for the past two weekends (it was the 8th). Big birthday requires a big celebration, right? Last weekend, Christine and Laura took me to see a psychic. While she the psychic was rather generic on many topics of concern, she did manage to hit a few sore spots. The most significant surprise was when she told me to give up on a certain man that I had been...fond of. She told me that it was never going to lead to anything long-term and I should move on immediately. I, of course, had already come to that conclusion; it was just taking the rest of me a little longer to follow. I was shocked that she could tell me about it so accurately when I hadn't said a word.

How can we possibly know, without supernatural assistance, when to give up on someone? I have never understood how to use my instincts to walk away when I know that someone, somewhere will tell me, "You dumped him because of THAT?"

Let's say I have a first date with someone who has potential but has some annoying/weird/scary quirks. Like talking about his ex-wife all through the date. Like that. So, what if everything else on the date is fine, but it's just that one thing? And what if the goodnight kiss makes up for the bizarre behavior?

Then I get to date #2, where I'm seeing more bad qualities than good, but there's still something redeemable about him.

This is where I get off the bus, folks. I've only had truly bad instincts about someone once, and I didn't let it get past a second date (or a goodnight kiss). So let's go to What If? Land.

What if I called a few friends and mentioned this guy's behavior and they insisted that I was too picky and that I should see him again? What if I went on a third date with this guy? I think we're forgetting the Third Date Rule, that irritating epiphany that if I don't put out, this one isn't going to call again.

Yeah. so now I'm thinking about sleeping with someone I don't even like because I'm not giving him a chance if I don't.

Does everyone understand where bad advice can lead?

Because I'm thinking it involves bad sex in which someone calls out the name of someone to whom he's no longer married. Before being tossed out bare-ass-nekkid.

Hey, what if, right?

D