You're Fat. Just Thought You Should Know.

Dear Neighbors:

Today I received a mass e-mail at work about their "health and wellness" group. In other words, a diet club. I skimmed through it, did a fist-pump at the line, "...if you don't respond to this e-mail, I will take you off of the mailing list..." and went on about my day. The diet group is in its third some-odd year on campus and many of the women have joined in an effort to lose weight. Some of them are really looking great. Good for them. 

Unfortunately, the group meets in the classroom next to mine and if I'm unlucky enough to be in the vicinity when members are arriving, I have to hear them all implore me to join. I've said time and time again that I'm not interested, that I like myself just the way I am, and still, they insist on mentioning it.

There is no way -- and I mean NO FUCKING WAY -- to invite someone to a weight-loss group tactfully. I took that invitation as: "You're fat. Just thought you should know." As a matter of fact, I do know. I know that I'm heavier than I should be and I don't care. I turned 40 a couple of years ago and decided that I was finished with the weight loss circle of pain and despair. Why do I need to be thin? I have no interest in wearing a bikini, men aren't interested in me regardless of what I weigh, and I could care less about obsessively counting calories and discussing the merits of one cardboard-tasting diet food over another.  In addition, I do not participate in discussions about food when I know there won't be any mention of gluten-free options. If I'm going to pay money for a weight-loss service, I insist on being an equal client and not a, "Oh, you can't have this recipe, can you?" client.

When my Frankenfoot has recovered enough for me to exercise, I will head back to the gym and burn off calories and stress on the elliptical and in the pool. I'm willing to make up for my unfortunate food choices with lots and lots of exercise. But I'm not willing to dedicate a part of my life to the documentation and accounting of everything that goes into my mouth. I can't relive the taste of something I ate today, so why should I relive the calorie count and the fat content?

Is there a tactful way to invite someone to a weight loss group? If so, I'd love to hear it. 

Done!

D